Does Motherhood Mean Giving Up Who You Are? A Talk with Kristin Baker

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Is work-life balance a myth? The mainstream idea of work-life balance is great, but it’s not necessarily attainable. Why? Well, the traditional idea of work-life balance can be static. It doesn’t fit everyone’s personalities or everyone’s desired schedules. Some people do not want to work on Mondays or Fridays; some people prefer working at the office, while others want to spend more time at home. Everyone’s idea of work-life balance is different. The trick is figuring out what that looks like—on your terms.

An incredible person who is encouraging mothers to create balance on their own terms is entrepreneur and Director of Coaching for Luscious Mother, Kristin Baker. Kristin’s vibrant soul, empathetic heart, and powerful compassion are truly awe-inspiring! She’s an amazing woman who is passionate about helping mothers reclaim their identities, maintain their wellbeing, and focus their lives so they can create the environment for their families to thrive.

Becoming a Luscious Mother: Kristin Baker’s Mission to Help Moms

Kristin Baker is a wife, mother, and Director of Coaching at Luscious Mother, a coaching company that is specifically for moms. Certainly, as a mom to a six-year-old girl, Kristin wears multiple hats. “I am occasionally a puppeteer, frequently an artist, a chef extraordinaire,” Kristin laughs, “and, most frequently, a playmate.”

Alongside these amazing roles, she is also an executive and leadership coach. Three years ago, she was working with a woman as she became a new mom, and, through their journey together, Kristin recognized the importance of normalizing the recognition that motherhood does not always turn out as you plan, but it can still be wonderful. Now, through her role at Luscious Mother, Kristin has the unique opportunity to come alongside moms and help them achieve their definition of a great life.

Luscious Mother is a collective of trained and certified life coaches who are committed to supporting moms in their creation and pursuit of great lives. “We think it's really important that we allow women to define what a great life is for them, and that it doesn't have to be defined by what other people think is great,” Kristin explains. Beautifully, the resilience and strength that often sets mothers apart are intertwined with how Luscious Mother launched as a large company.

Originally founded 7 years ago by Sarah Olin, Luscious Mother launched their expansion in 2020. Sarah Olin and her business partner, Anna Conathan, expanded the company with eight other incredible women who were also uniquely serving mothers, so they could join forces to support more moms and provide more services. Despite the onset of the pandemic in 2020, they uniquely engaged with moms who worked remotely by providing a weekly community call, so that these mothers could be seen, heard, and encouraged.

Particularly for Kristin, wellbeing is an aspect that is very near and dear to her heart and is something she emphasizes with her clients. As Kristin so wisely notes, wellbeing is different for everyone. In her own life, how she achieves wellbeing is by being active and walking her dog. “Wellbeing is constantly evolving,” she says. “It’s seeing what works and what my needs are and how to meet them.”

One of the main ways that she encourages all mothers to fortify their mental health and overall wellness is by putting up boundaries. This way, they are fully present to give their best and be their best selves. “The best part about motherhood is I get to be more me than ever,” she declares. However, in order to fully experience and express that, it’s vital to create space so you can grow and thrive.

The Disruption:Kristin Baker’s ultimate goal is to ensure that all children receive the love they deserve. What she has seen in her work is that when mothers are in a position to fill themselves up, they can pour out even more love and care for their children, which makes the entire family better.

“I had to learn in my own life as a mother that it doesn't work when you put everybody else ahead of you,” Kristin admits. “When you fill mom's cup, then you know and trust that the rest of your family is going to benefit.”

This is why boundaries are such a vital part of growth and motherhood. As Kristin says, boundaries are a tangible representation of putting yourself first. They are a declaration of what your priorities are and allow you to best serve your family. Certainly, it may take a few conversations with people who are not used to your new boundaries, but in the end, everyone is happier, more productive, and more joyful.

“What I see for the future is in doing this, we are unleashing the power of all of these women who are kind of running on empty right now and who don't get to show up as fully as they would otherwise in the world,” Kristin explains. When a mother is operating from a place of fullness, she is more present, more creative, and better able to transition between the various roles she fills throughout the day—whether it’s a chef, healer, playmate, CEO, lover, teacher, or creator.

Weekly Coaching Tip

Everyone is striving for work-life balance. It’s a hard thing to recognize, but work-life balance—at least as we traditionally think of it—is a myth.

Does that mean we are always going to schedules that are out of control? Not necessarily. It just means you must create balance on your own terms. This week, Elena shares three steps you can take to attain balance.

The first step to creating balance is by making your ideal schedule. Look at what would actually fill your tank. Instead of operating on a half tank or a quarter tank, what can you do so that you are experiencing fullness and having the balance that you dream of? In order to answer this question, we need to get clear on what our priorities are. This means asking ourselves deeper questions, such as:

  • Do you like to work? Or do you hate working?
  • Do you want to be at home more with your kids? Do you want to make sure you have help? Do you want to send your kids to school?
  • Do you want to spend more hours at the office? Or do you want to spend more hours at home?
  • Do you want more fun or play in your day? Do you want days off when most of society doesn’t, like Mondays or Fridays?

After you ask yourself those questions, write down what your ideal day would look like, from the moment you wake up to the moment you go to sleep. Look at every hour and write down everything you need and want to accomplish. 

Then, start practicing it for the week. Try to fulfill 80% of your schedule, instead of 100%. This will help you sustain your new schedule and adjust it more easily as you move forward.

The second step is looking at what actually fills your tank. Sometimes, people say, “If I eat right, sleep well, and exercise, then I’ll be sustained.” However, if you are already doing those things and still feel empty, then you need to take a look at the things you really desire doing that you’re not allowing yourself to do right now. Start with the things you want that you’re not giving yourself, not the things you’re doing well already. Make sure you schedule things that will fill your tank.

The final step is remembering that nothing is perfect. Creating balance is about practicing and carving out your schedule, so you can spend the majority of your day on your terms. This will not result in a perfect life, but it will help you create more balance.

If the traditional idea of work-life balanceisa myth, then you don’t have to run yourself ragged trying to fit your schedule into something that does not fit your lifestyle or your priorities. You can create whatever you want.  

How are you going to create balance in your life today?

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